Don't Be Fooled Into Believing These Three GRIEF MYTHS - Part Two
Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know. – Job 42:3
Last week I shared four myths that may cause us to stumble as we try to process grief. Today I have three more that you may have either said yourself (I have), or others have said to you. See if these connect:
I know how you feel. While this is often said with a good heart and from someone wanting to help, it usually doesn’t. For two reasons: first, it takes the attention off the griever and puts it on you, the helper. You’ve unintentionally highjacked the conversation! Secondly, you actually don’t know how the griever feels. You didn’t experience the lost relationship – the griever did. This statement assumes all grief is the same, which we know to be false.
Time heals all wounds. Actually it doesn't. Time, along with work on the grief journey brings healing. I've met many people who are still stuck in grief decades after losing a loved one. Investing our hearts, time, and energy will pay wonderful dividends in the coming years. Only time combined with walking the grief journey heals.
Pain should be avoided. For healing to take place we must lean into the pain, not run away from it. Jesus, in John 11, waded right into his grief over the death of his close friend, Lazarus. He faithfully experienced the pain of grief and trusted his Father to comfort and support him during this difficult time.
Next week we'll finish our discussion on grief myths.
The church setting the PERFECT place for the griever. Learn how to set up a Grief Journey weekend visit with Tim. It includes a public Grief Journey workshop (great visitor bringer) and training time for group leaders. CLICK HERE
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Dr. Timothy Sumerlin
Disciples In Motion