My fiancée and I do not see eye to eye on how someone becomes a Christian. Because of my views, I consider certain people to be right with God that she does not think are Christians. We do not teach the same thing about conversion. We are both committed to God, and there is no other big issue with us, just the spiritual one. This is causing a lot of strain, and I am not sure we can both go forward with this relationship. Your thoughts? Do you think it is wise to follow through and move from engagement to marriage?

If you and your wife are on different pages spiritually, I seriously doubt the marriage will last. This is the most central, intimate, vital area of your entire being. We are not talking about a small difference, such as preferred illustrations for explaining the Trinity. We are in the area of the "unities of the faith" (Ephesians 4:3-6). This is significant.

A die-hard vegetarian might marry a manic meat-eater and have a happy marriage, though I can see this failing. A sensitive woman might marry a boorish man, though I think this unfortunate combination would jeopardize the survival of the relationship. But for two people, both serious about their faith, to marry while they don't see eye to eye on the basics of the faith--how one is saved--that is a recipe for disaster!

(Can you imagine the confusion in your social life: she's trying to convert the person you already accept as a Christian? Or in your family: what would you teach your children about evangelism? And would you attend the same church, one of you suppressing what he/she really believes about the gospel message and how one is saved?)

If you cannot be in agreement in the most vital areas, the intimacy God intended will be thwarted. No, I would not marry if there were such a major spiritual difference between me and my fiancée.

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